Projects, Packages, Partying, Oh My! or If I had known PC would be like being in puberty again I might not have signed up

Ok, so returning from IST has been rough. We were warned that most people experience their lowest low right after IST- which makes sense. You spend two weeks with Americans, speaking English, experiencing American culture again, you aren't alone all the time, eating safi, American-esque food instead of the random food you can find in your village or manage to cook for yourself, and then you expect to start all these projects and get things done when you return to your site, becoming the amazing PCV you imagine yourself to be.... but that doesn't happen. In reality, you return to your site, you miss Americans, it is shocking to be so alone again, it is shockingly quiet in your house, and it takes a really long time to get things started. Or, at least, I feel like I am taking a long time to get things started. Talking to other volunteers, they are accelerating, they are starting things. People are starting to teach life skills at their secondary schools, or starting sports clubs, or starting tree nurseries... and I am doing the exact same thing I have been doing since I got to site. Granted, I work at my clinic three days a week, but I want to start my projects- it just takes so much time, and I need resources that I don't have in my village- like internet, and electricity. Also, internet is becoming more expensive, and it still sucks. Its like Comcast in Berkeley. It is the necessary evil in one's life, but it is so evil!

Ok, being more positive now. Friday was a really good day. I went to the clinic in the morning to clean with my mama and baba, and I told my mama all my ideas for projects and she told me that I was such a good child- she calls me her child- and that I have such wonderful ideas. Even if I accomplish nothing in my village, having the approval of my mama makes me feel so much better. I go back later in the day when clinic starts, I set things up, and I'm about to start asking the mamas for their cards to write their babies weights on, and my baba comes up to me and asks me to teach. I haven't prepared anything. I would be teaching in Kiswahili. I ask if I can teach Monday, at the next clinic, and he asks if I could just teach for ten minutes. Some background: my clinic is really understaffed, so even though we are supposed to teach something every clinic day, we don't. We are also supposed to do outreach to other villages, and don't, because only two people work at my clinic, and me. So, I give a lesson on family planning, off the cuff, and it is amazing! Women are answering my questions- which is really difficult to get them to do because of the Tanzanian education system and the use of corporal punishment in schools, which all these women are products of- they are laughing, I did a condom demonstration- condoms are a sensitive topic in my village- and my favorite part was blowing a condom up like a balloon in front of all of these women to dispel the myth that “condoms are too small.” Then we continued with a busy clinic day. By the end of it, I was exhausted- speaking Kiswahili all day is exhausting- but I felt so productive, and so good about what I am doing in my village. You can experience so many emotions in one day- when people describe PC as being a roller coaster, they are not lying- its kind of like being in puberty again because all of the emotions you experience are so intense.

I received a package from the girls that I lived with in college! It made me so happy! They sent me a portrait of the seven of us that hung in our house for two years, and wrote me a colorful letter with pictures. They sent me magazines, and bacon, and hot chocolate- with marshmallows!- and Sponge Bob mac and cheese! I miss them so much, and this package came at just the right time.

Which brings me to... This is what would be in the ideal care package from home (I have put a lot of thought into this)

1. Pictures from home to hang on my walls or show people in my vill. They make me so happy to look at them, and Tanzanians are fascinated to see America.
2. Dark chocolate. It does not exist in Tanzania. Chocolate is really expensive, a luxury, so really, any chocolate is appreciated, but especially dark chocolate.
3. Any and all cheese products that could survive the trip across the US, Atlantic Ocean, and most of the continent of Africa. Cheese is really difficult to find here. If I travel for two days to So High in Southern TZ, I can find real cheese, and sometimes I can find a cream cheese-esque thing in my regional town, but that isn't guaranteed.
4. Mac and Cheese- not easy mac because I don't have a microwave, but old fashioned mac and cheese with the boiled water.
5. Tuna packets. My friend brought one back to me from the States, and I cut the package into pieces so I could lick all of the tuna out of it. It was so good. I do not get enough protein on a daily basis. The Tanzanian diet is heavily reliant on carbs, and the most common protein source is beans.
6. (I now have more deorderant than I can use before I am 30. I have made good use of them as presents for PCVs, though) Deodorant. It is not in Tanzania. Tanzanians don't use it. I like Dove, powder scented, but any brand would be acceptable, but just no strong scents- the point is to not smell my armpits, even if they do smell like oranges. Considering how rarely I shower- and how I expect it will get worse when the rainy season ends and I stop having water- deodorant will be much appreciated for my own sense of wellness.
7. Wet wipes- too lazy to get a bucket of water to shower, or need to wash your feet before getting into bed? Bam! You're clean! Cat brought a lizard into your house and left blood on your floor, but you don't have cleaning products because you live in a third world country? Bam! Lizard blood gone!

For Jodi- this is a shout out to Little Amy. And nighties, and spritzers, and throwing cucumbers in people's eyes. Sometimes, I really love Peace Corps.